JAKE So...holiday parties are weird, right? That’s like a general thing we can all agree on? But we have them to let off steam, to celebrate a productive year. But not, like, too much steam. You know? Which is why I feel like we need to practice a little. Go in prepared. Because with no plan, well, it’s just like a playground and just way too easy to do something you regret. Oh no, not like that. Whatever you were thinking I assure you, not like that. I’m not afraid that the demons I successfully hold back 364 days a year will suddenly pour out. HAHA. Noooo, not like that. Just like, I get nervous, you know, I know you get nervous too.
It’s not that I think something’s gonna come out that shouldn’t. Or that I’ll wake up on Saturday morning afraid of going in on Monday. It’s just that we work with these people. We take blind samples together, we crunch data and send serious emails, they shouldn’t see me like that. And I don’t want to see them like that either. But we have this forced experiment, to see what we are like outside of work while fundamentally altered.
And Terri’s not drinking. So we have a control sample. And she’ll just be able to watch us all and take notes. Because that’s what we do and she’s really good at it. So I’ve gotta practice. I wrote up some note cards of good questions and we can practice answering them back and forth. That way we’ll be prepared. I know, it won’t be scientifically accurate, but it’s important we nail this holiday party if we don’t want anyone to know we’re dating.
Here you go. Start with the top one.
Originally written and performed for The Playground Experiment Holiday Party 2015